Why It’s Ok to Say No and Not Feel Guilty
Saying no can be one of those experiences that can leave you feeling like a bad person. The guilt that accompanies saying no can stay with you for days or even weeks, especially if you're very agreeable and always try your best to help others.
Is it wrong to say no, though? Absolutely not!
Why Saying No is an Important Life Skill
You make yourself a priority
There are only 24 hours in a day, which means you can only do so much. You can’t please everybody.
If you don’t take the time to do the things you want to do, the circle of people around you can actually start drowning you. Whether it's your boss, your sister or your partner, if you’re known for saying yes all the time, people will keep asking you for help.
One "no" in a day will open up opportunities for you to do exactly what YOU want to.
It helps you to set more boundaries
Boundaries are very healthy and absolutely necessary. When you have boundaries in place, you develop more self-respect and others learn to respect you more too.
There’s no reason for you to let people walk all over you.
A “no” from time to time will help you set boundaries that are necessary for healthy relationships.
The Art of Saying No
- Be direct. If you really don’t want to look after Jenny’s pets while she’s on vacation, say no. By being direct with someone who is trying to convince you to do something for them, you ensure they understand your limits and respect you more. You don’t even need to make an excuse, saying no is good enough.
- Plan your days. By being more organized, you get clear on your priorities for the day, which makes it that much easier to say no when you need to. When you don’t have the time to help someone, you don’t need to second guess your need to say no. Oh, they want you to help them paint their living room? You can't, you have a manicure at 5pm.
- Stop using the ‘S’ word. When you say sorry, it indicates you’ve done something wrong. And you should never have to apologize for saying no to someone. If you have a habit of apologizing, simply give a reason why you can’t do something or go somewhere instead of apologizing for it.
Learning to say no is a key to self-love and care and while it might be a hard habit for most people to break, it is possible.